Last July we found out we were expecting, as many of you know, I have never been a huge book worm/ researcher... but something about knowing I was bringing a little one into the world, I couldn't help but research and find the best options for my baby.
The day after we found out, I got on the phone and started calling around to different places. I knew I wanted a natural birth at this point simply for the reason that I was afraid of needles, ha. I got a hold of Chris Miller, a local midwife who does home births, and made an appointment to meet with her.
When I told Jake, he was quite hesitant. I got the impression that he thought once again I was a little crazy, ha. But as always, he was willing and open to go and hear what she had to say. After the appointment his gears switched. We loved the comfort and ease of Chris, we began our journey in learning that birth is a natural, beautiful part of life.
We went home and watched "Business of Being Born," an educational documentary on NetFlix about birth in America. We were both convinced that we wanted a natural homebirth. It is what felt right to us after our own reading, research, and prayers.
Throughout the rest of my pregnancy I heard it all. When you have a homebirth, everyone seems to love to tell you their birth horror stories. But the part that broke my heart were most stories seemed to have a common theme; a medical intervention, a complication and a doctor who came in and "saves the day." (Although they were the ones to convince the mom to do the original intervention that caused the problem). The other situation that makes me sad is when the mom is convinced that she is unable to give birth for one reason or another! Of course you are! But no story was discounted, I took every one to my midwife and researched them myself to be reminded over and over that birth is a natural, beautiful part of life and goes smooth when we do not intervene with unnecessary procedures.
Well Ila's due date came and went, which I'd expected since natural births actually average to be 41 weeks and a day not 40 weeks. But it didn't make it any easier.. home everyday waiting for our baby to arrive. I was quite restless. Any signs of labor, I would get so excited and think "tonight is the night." Jake teased me of crying wolf.
Well March 16 arrived finally, that evening around 8 our friend Steve was over with Jake and we were all hanging out. Eventually I stood up and walked out of the room and said "Geez you go 9 months without ANY cramps then you get the worst ones of your life." But I didn't think anything more of it. I went to the back of the house and started timing these cramps. Well they were two minutes apart and about 45 seconds long.
It went on for 20 minutes and I text Jake and said "I need you." He came back and said "Sam and Emily are here now and they're all going out to eat, should I go with them?" In Jake's mind tonight was no different than all the other nights I thought I was in labor. It didn't take him long to realize...I said "No, will you go fill up the birth tub?" He looked at me funny knowing that labor is normally 12+ hours but did it anyway and knew it was the night.
Labor is a beautiful thing. I knew exactly what to do through my intuition. I had taken a Bradley birth class which I am grateful for all the reading and education I took away from it, but my intuition was such a huge part! I was in transition (the most intense part of labor, transitioning from contractions to pushing) basically from the beginning, so I stood throughout my entire first part of labor. I would feel a contraction come on and just lean against the wall or sink or anything I could find. I tried two times to switch positions to decrease the intensity, but I learned that those positions were probably for an earlier part of labor because nothing helped. The only way I could make it through a contraction was to lean and stand. Which, wow to those women who have had a natural birth while laying stuck in a hospital bed! The one contraction I layed down for was soo much more intense! I can't imagine having all my contractions that way! You women are tough!
What saved me was being able to walk and move around. The diversity of moving even just a few feet every once in a while between contractions kept me going!
Well after an hour of these intense contractions that were on top of each other, I got into the water. Right as I got into the tub my water broke and I had two of the most intense contractions. On my third contraction I had the urge to push. Before this point I hadn't realized how quickly things were going. But the urge to push kind of alarmed me... I looked to Jake and said "I don't know why but my body is pushing, or at least I feel like doing that, what should I do?" He said to just trust my body and if it's telling me to push to go for it. I was a little scared that I was still at like a 2 since that was the last I had heard in my appointment that afternoon. But I knew to trust my body and it wouldn't be wanting to push if I wasn't ready for it, so I went with it.
When my water had broke we called Chris and she was on her way to the house. She got there around 9:20, put her tools down and started saying "we've got a full head of hair." What? The baby is almost here? Crazy! At 9:47 pm baby was born! At this point we didn't know if it was a boy or a girl! We were so taken in the moment of meeting this sweet baby it didn't matter anymore.
There are no words to adequately describe the feelings of love, peace and joy that filled our home. Enough to forget that moments before you we're experiencing the most intensity you had ever experienced in life. Maybe not forget, but realize it brought you this angel so it was all worth it. I loved being pregnant. Every day was magical to me that there was a life inside. I may sound crazy but I loved the whole birthing experience and more than it all I love holding this innocent baby straight from heaven in my arms.
What a joy motherhood is. I am posting this a year later. It has sat as a draft for a full year. What a beautiful year it has been! I have a toddler now. Where does time go! Sweet Ila Rose you are loved by many and bring joy into all of our lives,
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